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My Two Cents

My Two Cents

March 8, 2013
The Red Bulls’ Analyst – Closure with 2012

Chris Brandon Whitaker writes The Red Bulls’ Analyst column monthly, providing analysis for a team and therapy for fans.

by Chris Brandon Whitaker
Special to

For this month’s session, the Red Bulls’ Analyst will address the issue of closure with regard to the 2012 alums no longer on the team.

Presenting Concern:

With a fresh season underway, fans and players are familiarizing themselves with the new faces on the team. While it may take a while to get to know and love the new roster, the adjustment period can be made all the harder when we miss those we’ve supported throughout the previous season. Just how can the team’s fans and players move on from the past?

Client History:

The Red Bulls begin the season in the wake of massive turnover from 2012. In fact, only one survivor remains from the previous managerial staff and a mere 12 players from last year’s roster. While there is usually a good amount of personnel movement with this team, there is radical change when a new coach is installed. Despite 14 coaches in the past 18 years, fans and players had enjoyed a measure of stability in the last three years under head coach Hans Backe.

Mental Health Issue: Need for Closure

The need for closure describes the desire people have for information that will allow them to conclude an issue that has been clouded in uncertainty. A feeling of resolution often depends on some clear knowledge about the status of others involved in a past traumatic experience (such as, getting bounced from the playoff quarterfinals for the umpteenth time.)

Treatment: Ex-personnel Updates

Here is a list of destinations for all the coaches and players who are no longer with the team:

Forward Jhonny Arteaga - Pittsburgh Riverhounds

Forward Jose Angulo – Unattached

Head coach Hans Backe – TV analyst (Sweden)

Defender Jonathan Borrajo – Mjøndalen IF (Norway)

Defender Wilman Conde – Unattached

Striker Kenny Cooper – Dallas

Goalkeeper Bill Gaudette – Unattached

Assistant coach Jan Halvor Halvorsen – FK Bodø/Glimt (Norway)

Forward Corey Hertzog – Vancouver

Goalkeeper coach -- Todd Hoffard – ONE on ONE Soccer Camps

Defender Stephen Keel – Dallas

Midfieder-forward Sebastien LeToux – Philadelphia

Midfielder Joel Lindpere – Chicago

Defender-midfielder Rafael Marquez – Leon (Mexico)

Victor Palsson – NEC (Holland)

Defender Tyler Ruthven – Unattached

General manager Erik Soler – TV commentator (Norway)

Midfielder-defender Jan Gunnar Solli – Vålerenga (Norway)

Midfielder Teemu Taino – HJK Helsinki (Finland)

Goalkeeper -- Jeremy Vuolo – Unattached

Therapeutic Intervention: Balloon releases

Now that we have a better sense of where most of the ex-Red Bulls have gone, we need to complete the closure process by releasing a number of dedicated balloons into the New Jersey smog.

Dallas: There’s a gaping hole where the Red Bulls once had Cooper’s 18 goals and Keel Cam, but it’ll be easier to let go if we picture the two of you in cowboy hats.

Scandinavia: No less than six exes have headed to the lands of the midnight sun. To you, we hoist a glass of aquavit and say: ‘Skol!’

Leon: Rafa’s out of action already?! We feel for you, amigos.

Unattached: While we’re still in limbo with those who remain unattached to a team, we wish you strength in your future trials.

Other MLS teams: Best of luck to the rest on your new MLS teams, but when it comes to playing NYRB, all this sniveling closure will be over. It’s game on, and dread the return to the cathedral of soccer!

(For a city with more psychotherapists than bartenders and a team with more issues than a magazine stand, the Red Bulls’ Analyst offers therapeutic counsel rather than a cure.)

"The opinions reflected in the My Two Cents columns do not express the views of the editors or management of BigAppleSoccer. com"
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